On April 1, 2025, strike a blow for freedom and democracy
In November 2000 Florida played a pivotal role in the election of George W. Bush as president of the United States.
On April 1, 2025, Florida can atone for that sin in a special election to fill two U.S. House seats. One is in District 6 and pits Democratic candidate Joshua Weil against Republican Randy Fine to fill the congressional seat vacated by Michael Waltz, who is now Donald Trump’s national security adviser. The other is in our own District 1, where Democrat Gay Valimont hopes to beat Republican Jimmy Patronis for the seat once held by Matt Gaetz, who resigned to be Trump’s attorney general.
If the Democrats win both seats they’ll reduce the Republican majority in the House to only three votes, which would severely constrain Trump’s efforts to steal our democracy.
I live in District 1 and I’ve looked into the candidacies of both Valimont and Patronis. You could not ask for a more stark contrast between two candidates.
Patronis has not once presented any idea or suggestion as to how he might represent the people of District 1 or make their lives better. All he has done is wrap himself in the flag of Donald Trump and blathered about how the Democrats hate MAGA.
Valimont, on the other hand, has a wealth of ideas.
For instance, she wants to locate a VA hospital in the Florida panhandle. That makes sense, given the panhandle’s large population of military personnel, both active duty and retired. To the west, in Escambia County, we have Pensacola Naval Air Station. In the county adjoining Escambia, Santa Rosa, lies Whiting Field, a Navy flight training school. To the far east is Tyndall Air Force Base. Here in Okaloosa County we have Eglin Air Force Base, the largest by area Air Force base in the world; Hurlburt Field, an Air Force special operations base; Duke Field, for the Air Force Reserve; an Army cantonment for the 7th Special Forces, and the Destin Coast Guard station at the foot of the Marler Bridge.
The nearest VA hospital is in Biloxi, Miss. My father, when he was being treated for cancer, had to drive to Biloxi, about 2½ hours west of Fort Walton Beach. The VA has a clinic at Eglin but not a hospital.
Valimont also wants to protect the military mission, from Eglin’s water test ranges to military benefits for both active duty and retired, and the F-35 program, which Trump has threatened to cut.
She also wants to reinstate President Joe Biden’s cap on insulin costs. When Biden was president, insulin was capped at $35 per dose. When Trump was elected he eliminated that cap and now insulin costs vary widely, depending on whether a patient has insurance, what kind of insurance they have, and who the insulin supplier is.
Valimont says she has a plan for reducing the cost of homeowner’s insurance by 25 percent. As you know, homeowner’s insurance is a very big deal here in the state of Florida, where hurricanes have driven up the costs of insuring a house to the point where many homeowners are simply going without. My policy runs me about $4,000 per year, so a 25 percent cut would save me about $1,000.
Democrats have a long tradition of looking out for the interests of Northwest Florida. Back when I was a kid, Bob Sikes, the old he-coon, protected the panhandle’s military mission and generally looked after the folks who live here. My impression is Valimont wants to fill a similar role.
So on April 1, 2025, I’ll be voting for Gay Valimont. If you live in Florida’s District 1 I hope you’ll do the same. If you live in District 6 please consider voting for Josh Weil.
Together, we can strike a blow for the preservation of freedom and democracy in this country.
About the author:
Del Stone Jr. is a professional fiction writer. He is known primarily for his work in the contemporary dark fiction field, but has also published science fiction and contemporary fantasy. Stone’s stories, poetry and scripts have appeared in publications such as Amazing Stories, Eldritch Tales, and Bantam-Spectra’s Full Spectrum. His short fiction has been published in The Year’s Best Horror Stories XXII; Alfred Hitchcock’s Mystery Magazine; the Pocket Books anthology More Phobias; the Barnes & Noble anthologies 100 Wicked Little Witch Stories, Horrors! 365 Scary Stories, and 100 Astounding Little Alien Stories; the HWA anthology Psychos; and other short fiction venues, like Blood Muse, Live Without a Net, Zombiesque and Sex Macabre. Stone’s comic book debut was in the Clive Barker series of books, Hellraiser, published by Marvel/Epic and reprinted in The Best of Hellraiser anthology. He has also published stories in Penthouse Comix, and worked with artist Dave Dorman on many projects, including the illustrated novella “Roadkill,” a short story for the Andrew Vachss anthology Underground from Dark Horse, an ashcan titled “December” for Hero Illustrated, and several of Dorman’s Wasted Lands novellas and comics, such as Rail from Image and “The Uninvited.” Stone’s novel, Dead Heat, won the 1996 International Horror Guild’s award for best first novel and was a runner-up for the Bram Stoker Award. Stone has also been a finalist for the IHG award for short fiction, the British Fantasy Award for best novella, and a semifinalist for the Nebula and Writers of the Future awards. His stories have appeared in anthologies that have won the Bram Stoker Award and the World Fantasy Award. Two of his works were optioned for film, the novella “Black Tide” and short story “Crisis Line.”
Stone recently retired after a 41-year career in journalism. He won numerous awards for his work, and in 1986 was named Florida’s best columnist in his circulation division by the Florida Society of Newspaper Editors. In 2001 he received an honorable mention from the National Lesbian and Gay Journalists Association for his essay “When Freedom of Speech Ends” and in 2003 he was voted Best of the Best in the category of columnists by Emerald Coast Magazine. He participated in book signings and awareness campaigns, and was a guest on local television and radio programs.
As an addendum, Stone is single, kills tomatoes and morning glories with ruthless efficiency, once tied the stem of a cocktail cherry in a knot with his tongue, and carries a permanent scar on his chest after having been shot with a paintball gun. He’s in his 60s as of this writing but doesn’t look a day over 94.
Contact Del at [email protected]. He is also on Facebook, twitter, Pinterest, tumblr, TikTok, and Instagram. Visit his website at delstonejr.com .
I’ve got a question for the MAGAts:
The other day I filled up the gas tank on my car. The price seemed kind of high so I checked – gas was 23 cents a gallon higher on Wednesday than it was on Jan. 20, 2025, when Joe Biden left office.
Why is that?
I thought your boy, Diaper Donnie, was going to fix all that! Isn’t that what he said? Prices will come down? On day one?
He can’t use the pandemic as an excuse. The United States is the world’s number one producer of oil, so he can’t use that as an excuse. America leads the world in exploring for new oil resources, so he can’t even use that for an excuse.
It’s like the price of eggs. Didn’t he say he was going to lower to the price of eggs? Because I checked this week – eggs are A DOLLAR higher now than they were when Sleepy Joe left office. A DOLLAR!
I don’t get it. Gas prices are higher. Egg prices are higher. Unemployment is higher. Inflation is higher. The only things lower are the stock market and consumer confidence.
Trump said he would lower the price of eggs. Then he said we might have to go through some temporary pain before prices come down. Now he’s saying he wishes people would stop bitching about the price of eggs.
Wow, what an accomplishment. I’m so glad you, ahem, “intellectually impaired individuals” elected Donald Trump president.
He really is making America “great” again.
Or is that “grate”?
About the author:
Del Stone Jr. is a professional fiction writer. He is known primarily for his work in the contemporary dark fiction field, but has also published science fiction and contemporary fantasy. Stone’s stories, poetry and scripts have appeared in publications such as Amazing Stories, Eldritch Tales, and Bantam-Spectra’s Full Spectrum. His short fiction has been published in The Year’s Best Horror Stories XXII; Alfred Hitchcock’s Mystery Magazine; the Pocket Books anthology More Phobias; the Barnes & Noble anthologies 100 Wicked Little Witch Stories, Horrors! 365 Scary Stories, and 100 Astounding Little Alien Stories; the HWA anthology Psychos; and other short fiction venues, like Blood Muse, Live Without a Net, Zombiesque and Sex Macabre. Stone’s comic book debut was in the Clive Barker series of books, Hellraiser, published by Marvel/Epic and reprinted in The Best of Hellraiser anthology. He has also published stories in Penthouse Comix, and worked with artist Dave Dorman on many projects, including the illustrated novella “Roadkill,” a short story for the Andrew Vachss anthology Underground from Dark Horse, an ashcan titled “December” for Hero Illustrated, and several of Dorman’s Wasted Lands novellas and comics, such as Rail from Image and “The Uninvited.” Stone’s novel, Dead Heat, won the 1996 International Horror Guild’s award for best first novel and was a runner-up for the Bram Stoker Award. Stone has also been a finalist for the IHG award for short fiction, the British Fantasy Award for best novella, and a semifinalist for the Nebula and Writers of the Future awards. His stories have appeared in anthologies that have won the Bram Stoker Award and the World Fantasy Award. Two of his works were optioned for film, the novella “Black Tide” and short story “Crisis Line.”
Stone recently retired after a 41-year career in journalism. He won numerous awards for his work, and in 1986 was named Florida’s best columnist in his circulation division by the Florida Society of Newspaper Editors. In 2001 he received an honorable mention from the National Lesbian and Gay Journalists Association for his essay “When Freedom of Speech Ends” and in 2003 he was voted Best of the Best in the category of columnists by Emerald Coast Magazine. He participated in book signings and awareness campaigns, and was a guest on local television and radio programs.
As an addendum, Stone is single, kills tomatoes and morning glories with ruthless efficiency, once tied the stem of a cocktail cherry in a knot with his tongue, and carries a permanent scar on his chest after having been shot with a paintball gun. He’s in his 60s as of this writing but doesn’t look a day over 94.
Contact Del at [email protected]. He is also on Facebook, twitter, Pinterest, tumblr, TikTok, and Instagram. Visit his website at delstonejr.com .
A French government official believes the United States should return the Statue of Liberty to France.
The statue was a gift from France in 1886 to celebrate the centennial of America’s independence from England, and it was a symbol of the enduring friendship between France and the United States. Over the years it has become a symbol of freedom for people all over the world.
But with America’s drift toward authoritarianism and its rampant xenophobia, it no longer embodies those ideals.
I think America should return the Statue of Liberty to France. It is no longer worthy of such a statue.
In its place, America should construct a statue of a gigantic golden calf. The MAGAts will understand the significance of that, seeing as how they’re such Biblical scholars.
If not a calf, then a giant golden pig. Pink Floyd fans will know what I mean.
About the author:
Del Stone Jr. is a professional fiction writer. He is known primarily for his work in the contemporary dark fiction field, but has also published science fiction and contemporary fantasy. Stone’s stories, poetry and scripts have appeared in publications such as Amazing Stories, Eldritch Tales, and Bantam-Spectra’s Full Spectrum. His short fiction has been published in The Year’s Best Horror Stories XXII; Alfred Hitchcock’s Mystery Magazine; the Pocket Books anthology More Phobias; the Barnes & Noble anthologies 100 Wicked Little Witch Stories, Horrors! 365 Scary Stories, and 100 Astounding Little Alien Stories; the HWA anthology Psychos; and other short fiction venues, like Blood Muse, Live Without a Net, Zombiesque and Sex Macabre. Stone’s comic book debut was in the Clive Barker series of books, Hellraiser, published by Marvel/Epic and reprinted in The Best of Hellraiser anthology. He has also published stories in Penthouse Comix, and worked with artist Dave Dorman on many projects, including the illustrated novella “Roadkill,” a short story for the Andrew Vachss anthology Underground from Dark Horse, an ashcan titled “December” for Hero Illustrated, and several of Dorman’s Wasted Lands novellas and comics, such as Rail from Image and “The Uninvited.” Stone’s novel, Dead Heat, won the 1996 International Horror Guild’s award for best first novel and was a runner-up for the Bram Stoker Award. Stone has also been a finalist for the IHG award for short fiction, the British Fantasy Award for best novella, and a semifinalist for the Nebula and Writers of the Future awards. His stories have appeared in anthologies that have won the Bram Stoker Award and the World Fantasy Award. Two of his works were optioned for film, the novella “Black Tide” and short story “Crisis Line.”
Stone recently retired after a 41-year career in journalism. He won numerous awards for his work, and in 1986 was named Florida’s best columnist in his circulation division by the Florida Society of Newspaper Editors. In 2001 he received an honorable mention from the National Lesbian and Gay Journalists Association for his essay “When Freedom of Speech Ends” and in 2003 he was voted Best of the Best in the category of columnists by Emerald Coast Magazine. He participated in book signings and awareness campaigns, and was a guest on local television and radio programs.
As an addendum, Stone is single, kills tomatoes and morning glories with ruthless efficiency, once tied the stem of a cocktail cherry in a knot with his tongue, and carries a permanent scar on his chest after having been shot with a paintball gun. He’s in his 60s as of this writing but doesn’t look a day over 94.
Contact Del at [email protected]. He is also on Facebook, twitter, Pinterest, tumblr, TikTok, and Instagram. Visit his website at delstonejr.com .
I can always tell when I’m under attack by a MAGA person because the first thing they do, always, every single time, is they attack me.
They ridicule me for my age. “Oh, look at the old coot. Isn’t it past your bedtime? Get back to the nursing home, Grandpa. You forgot your meds.”
Or they attack my being gay. “You’re just an old queen, a fudge-packer, a groomer, a pedophile. We don’t need to listen to you.”
Finally, they attack my appearance. “Look at your gray hair, the loose skin around your throat, those awful liver spots!”
They never, ever attack the content of my message, and that’s for two reasons: 1. I deal in facts, and it’s hard to argue against facts. 2. They don’t have the intellectual horsepower to argue with me. They’d rather name-call because that’s easy.
And if I respond in kind, if I give them a taste of their own medicine, they cry out, “Oh goodness! He’s calling me names. I’m a victim! Help me, Jesus! Help me!”
Many of the MAGAs I meet are childish halfwits who can’t tell the difference between a con artist and the Constitution.
There, MAGA. How’d you like that? Did it feel good? Ready to repent?
Pathetic.
About the author:
Del Stone Jr. is a professional fiction writer. He is known primarily for his work in the contemporary dark fiction field, but has also published science fiction and contemporary fantasy. Stone’s stories, poetry and scripts have appeared in publications such as Amazing Stories, Eldritch Tales, and Bantam-Spectra’s Full Spectrum. His short fiction has been published in The Year’s Best Horror Stories XXII; Alfred Hitchcock’s Mystery Magazine; the Pocket Books anthology More Phobias; the Barnes & Noble anthologies 100 Wicked Little Witch Stories, Horrors! 365 Scary Stories, and 100 Astounding Little Alien Stories; the HWA anthology Psychos; and other short fiction venues, like Blood Muse, Live Without a Net, Zombiesque and Sex Macabre. Stone’s comic book debut was in the Clive Barker series of books, Hellraiser, published by Marvel/Epic and reprinted in The Best of Hellraiser anthology. He has also published stories in Penthouse Comix, and worked with artist Dave Dorman on many projects, including the illustrated novella “Roadkill,” a short story for the Andrew Vachss anthology Underground from Dark Horse, an ashcan titled “December” for Hero Illustrated, and several of Dorman’s Wasted Lands novellas and comics, such as Rail from Image and “The Uninvited.” Stone’s novel, Dead Heat, won the 1996 International Horror Guild’s award for best first novel and was a runner-up for the Bram Stoker Award. Stone has also been a finalist for the IHG award for short fiction, the British Fantasy Award for best novella, and a semifinalist for the Nebula and Writers of the Future awards. His stories have appeared in anthologies that have won the Bram Stoker Award and the World Fantasy Award. Two of his works were optioned for film, the novella “Black Tide” and short story “Crisis Line.”
Stone recently retired after a 41-year career in journalism. He won numerous awards for his work, and in 1986 was named Florida’s best columnist in his circulation division by the Florida Society of Newspaper Editors. In 2001 he received an honorable mention from the National Lesbian and Gay Journalists Association for his essay “When Freedom of Speech Ends” and in 2003 he was voted Best of the Best in the category of columnists by Emerald Coast Magazine. He participated in book signings and awareness campaigns, and was a guest on local television and radio programs.
As an addendum, Stone is single, kills tomatoes and morning glories with ruthless efficiency, once tied the stem of a cocktail cherry in a knot with his tongue, and carries a permanent scar on his chest after having been shot with a paintball gun. He’s in his 60s as of this writing but doesn’t look a day over 94.
Contact Del at [email protected]. He is also on Facebook, twitter, Pinterest, tumblr, TikTok, and Instagram. Visit his website at delstonejr.com .
Here’s the latest assault on our sensibilities: The Supreme Court has agreed to take up a case involving gay conversion “therapy.”
The question is: Do states have a right to ban gay conversion “therapy,” which has already been discredited by the medical community as not only ineffective but downright cruel and barbaric.
What I find incredible is that the court is perfectly willing to let the states decide if a woman can have an abortion, but maybe not so much if a state can decide if a child should be sent to a state-sanctioned torture chamber.
This regime has always cared for the unborn more than the already born, and such a decision would be consistent with that warped philosophy.
Look, folks, you need to care about this because while it may not affect you personally, eventually they’ll come for something that does affect you personally, and we’re all in this together.
I’ll be keeping an eye on the Supreme Court and let you know what they decide.
About the author:
Del Stone Jr. is a professional fiction writer. He is known primarily for his work in the contemporary dark fiction field, but has also published science fiction and contemporary fantasy. Stone’s stories, poetry and scripts have appeared in publications such as Amazing Stories, Eldritch Tales, and Bantam-Spectra’s Full Spectrum. His short fiction has been published in The Year’s Best Horror Stories XXII; Alfred Hitchcock’s Mystery Magazine; the Pocket Books anthology More Phobias; the Barnes & Noble anthologies 100 Wicked Little Witch Stories, Horrors! 365 Scary Stories, and 100 Astounding Little Alien Stories; the HWA anthology Psychos; and other short fiction venues, like Blood Muse, Live Without a Net, Zombiesque and Sex Macabre. Stone’s comic book debut was in the Clive Barker series of books, Hellraiser, published by Marvel/Epic and reprinted in The Best of Hellraiser anthology. He has also published stories in Penthouse Comix, and worked with artist Dave Dorman on many projects, including the illustrated novella “Roadkill,” a short story for the Andrew Vachss anthology Underground from Dark Horse, an ashcan titled “December” for Hero Illustrated, and several of Dorman’s Wasted Lands novellas and comics, such as Rail from Image and “The Uninvited.” Stone’s novel, Dead Heat, won the 1996 International Horror Guild’s award for best first novel and was a runner-up for the Bram Stoker Award. Stone has also been a finalist for the IHG award for short fiction, the British Fantasy Award for best novella, and a semifinalist for the Nebula and Writers of the Future awards. His stories have appeared in anthologies that have won the Bram Stoker Award and the World Fantasy Award. Two of his works were optioned for film, the novella “Black Tide” and short story “Crisis Line.”
Stone recently retired after a 41-year career in journalism. He won numerous awards for his work, and in 1986 was named Florida’s best columnist in his circulation division by the Florida Society of Newspaper Editors. In 2001 he received an honorable mention from the National Lesbian and Gay Journalists Association for his essay “When Freedom of Speech Ends” and in 2003 he was voted Best of the Best in the category of columnists by Emerald Coast Magazine. He participated in book signings and awareness campaigns, and was a guest on local television and radio programs.
As an addendum, Stone is single, kills tomatoes and morning glories with ruthless efficiency, once tied the stem of a cocktail cherry in a knot with his tongue, and carries a permanent scar on his chest after having been shot with a paintball gun. He’s in his 60s as of this writing but doesn’t look a day over 94.
Contact Del at [email protected]. He is also on Facebook, twitter, Pinterest, tumblr, TikTok, and Instagram. Visit his website at delstonejr.com .
This is a screen capture from a video I took while marching in a protest in downtown Fort Walton Beach, Florida, on March 8, 2025. Image by Del Stone Jr.
Lately I’ve been crossposting some of my TikTok videos to Instagram. The reception they’ve gotten there has been less than friendly. In fact, I never knew there were so many assholes on Instagram, but boy, there sure are.
For instance, my video about marching in a protest. A number of commenters said things like, “You idiot, what a waste of time. What did you accomplish?”
Indeed, what did I accomplish?
As a matter of fact I feel like I accomplished three things:
1. By marching, we showed the community that not everyone here is a blood-drinking MAGAt extremist.
2. We emboldened others to join us next time.
3. By marching I felt like I had accomplished something. Maybe not much, maybe nothing at all, but at least something. I was determined not to sit on the sidelines bitching about things while doing nothing.
Don’t let anyone tell you protests don’t work. Next time they do, ask them if they remember the Boston Tea Party. Or the Vietnam War protests, which compelled this nation to extract itself from that goddamn quagmire. Or the Olympic athletes who held their fists aloft during the medal-awarding ceremony. Or Colin Kaepernick taking a knee during the national anthem. You may not agree with what they were protesting, but you damn sure remember the protest.
Besides, if protests don’t do any good then why bitch about them? Let the protesters march around, making fools of themselves. It’s no skin off your nose.
If you don’t want to march in support of what you believe in, fine. But at least have the decency to keep your mouth shut.
About the author:
Del Stone Jr. is a professional fiction writer. He is known primarily for his work in the contemporary dark fiction field, but has also published science fiction and contemporary fantasy. Stone’s stories, poetry and scripts have appeared in publications such as Amazing Stories, Eldritch Tales, and Bantam-Spectra’s Full Spectrum. His short fiction has been published in The Year’s Best Horror Stories XXII; Alfred Hitchcock’s Mystery Magazine; the Pocket Books anthology More Phobias; the Barnes & Noble anthologies 100 Wicked Little Witch Stories, Horrors! 365 Scary Stories, and 100 Astounding Little Alien Stories; the HWA anthology Psychos; and other short fiction venues, like Blood Muse, Live Without a Net, Zombiesque and Sex Macabre. Stone’s comic book debut was in the Clive Barker series of books, Hellraiser, published by Marvel/Epic and reprinted in The Best of Hellraiser anthology. He has also published stories in Penthouse Comix, and worked with artist Dave Dorman on many projects, including the illustrated novella “Roadkill,” a short story for the Andrew Vachss anthology Underground from Dark Horse, an ashcan titled “December” for Hero Illustrated, and several of Dorman’s Wasted Lands novellas and comics, such as Rail from Image and “The Uninvited.” Stone’s novel, Dead Heat, won the 1996 International Horror Guild’s award for best first novel and was a runner-up for the Bram Stoker Award. Stone has also been a finalist for the IHG award for short fiction, the British Fantasy Award for best novella, and a semifinalist for the Nebula and Writers of the Future awards. His stories have appeared in anthologies that have won the Bram Stoker Award and the World Fantasy Award. Two of his works were optioned for film, the novella “Black Tide” and short story “Crisis Line.”
Stone recently retired after a 41-year career in journalism. He won numerous awards for his work, and in 1986 was named Florida’s best columnist in his circulation division by the Florida Society of Newspaper Editors. In 2001 he received an honorable mention from the National Lesbian and Gay Journalists Association for his essay “When Freedom of Speech Ends” and in 2003 he was voted Best of the Best in the category of columnists by Emerald Coast Magazine. He participated in book signings and awareness campaigns, and was a guest on local television and radio programs.
As an addendum, Stone is single, kills tomatoes and morning glories with ruthless efficiency, once tied the stem of a cocktail cherry in a knot with his tongue, and carries a permanent scar on his chest after having been shot with a paintball gun. He’s in his 60s as of this writing but doesn’t look a day over 94.
Contact Del at [email protected]. He is also on Facebook, twitter, Pinterest, tumblr, TikTok, and Instagram. Visit his website at delstonejr.com .
People listen to speakers at a rally held at Fort Walton Landing on March 8, 2025, prior to embarking on a protest march through the downtown area of Fort Walton Beach. Image by Del Stone Jr.
On Saturday, in my small, conservative Northwest Florida town, we marched in protest.
It wasn’t a big protest. Between 50 and 75 people gathered at Fort Walton Landing to hear speakers. About 25 people marched from The Landing, across Main Street and along the sidewalk to Perry Avenue, then back to The Landing.
Miraculously, we crossed all roads without getting mowed down. There were few if any hecklers – one knucklehead yelled “Trump!” from his car window.
But there were a great many horn honks for support. A number of people clapped and cheered, or shouted “Good job, guys!”
That surprised me. Some folks were concerned about harassment and confrontation before the march. It didn’t happen.
If you were thinking of taking part in a protest, I’m not going to tell you it’s OK or not. But in my short stroll for democracy, everything worked out just fine.
About the author:
Del Stone Jr. is a professional fiction writer. He is known primarily for his work in the contemporary dark fiction field, but has also published science fiction and contemporary fantasy. Stone’s stories, poetry and scripts have appeared in publications such as Amazing Stories, Eldritch Tales, and Bantam-Spectra’s Full Spectrum. His short fiction has been published in The Year’s Best Horror Stories XXII; Alfred Hitchcock’s Mystery Magazine; the Pocket Books anthology More Phobias; the Barnes & Noble anthologies 100 Wicked Little Witch Stories, Horrors! 365 Scary Stories, and 100 Astounding Little Alien Stories; the HWA anthology Psychos; and other short fiction venues, like Blood Muse, Live Without a Net, Zombiesque and Sex Macabre. Stone’s comic book debut was in the Clive Barker series of books, Hellraiser, published by Marvel/Epic and reprinted in The Best of Hellraiser anthology. He has also published stories in Penthouse Comix, and worked with artist Dave Dorman on many projects, including the illustrated novella “Roadkill,” a short story for the Andrew Vachss anthology Underground from Dark Horse, an ashcan titled “December” for Hero Illustrated, and several of Dorman’s Wasted Lands novellas and comics, such as Rail from Image and “The Uninvited.” Stone’s novel, Dead Heat, won the 1996 International Horror Guild’s award for best first novel and was a runner-up for the Bram Stoker Award. Stone has also been a finalist for the IHG award for short fiction, the British Fantasy Award for best novella, and a semifinalist for the Nebula and Writers of the Future awards. His stories have appeared in anthologies that have won the Bram Stoker Award and the World Fantasy Award. Two of his works were optioned for film, the novella “Black Tide” and short story “Crisis Line.”
Stone recently retired after a 41-year career in journalism. He won numerous awards for his work, and in 1986 was named Florida’s best columnist in his circulation division by the Florida Society of Newspaper Editors. In 2001 he received an honorable mention from the National Lesbian and Gay Journalists Association for his essay “When Freedom of Speech Ends” and in 2003 he was voted Best of the Best in the category of columnists by Emerald Coast Magazine. He participated in book signings and awareness campaigns, and was a guest on local television and radio programs.
As an addendum, Stone is single, kills tomatoes and morning glories with ruthless efficiency, once tied the stem of a cocktail cherry in a knot with his tongue, and carries a permanent scar on his chest after having been shot with a paintball gun. He’s in his 60s as of this writing but doesn’t look a day over 94.
Contact Del at [email protected]. He is also on Facebook, twitter, Pinterest, tumblr, TikTok, and Instagram. Visit his website at delstonejr.com .
Image by Warner Bros.
“Mickey 17” Starring Robert Pattinson as Mickey “Mickey 17” Barnes, Naomi “Gonna Kick Your Ass” Ackie as Nasha, Mark Ruffalo as Kenneth “Trump Christian” Marshall, Toni “Moms for Liberty Prototype” Collette, and others. (Names in parentheses, barring Pattinson’s, ascribed by reviewer Mladen Rudman). Directed by Bong Joon Ho. 2 hours, 17 minutes. Rated R. In theaters.
Plot summary: A slave finds freedom. A love story. An allegory for the way aliens are treated by the White Man. Religion is idolatry because it’s always channeled by a pontificator who places himself above God or whatever deity a mass of people worship. Take your pick. Basically, it’s about a small-time con artist who signs up to be an “expendable,” somebody who can be cloned through 3-D printing, aboard a ship headed to the planet Niflheim. Through his deaths and rebirths he grows into something more than an expendable, as do some of the people around him.
Mladen’s take
“Mickey 17” should’ve been titled “Mickey Mouse 17,” as in something seriously malfunctioned during the planning or production of this film. I say that with a broken heart and a mound of disappointment because I adore all the other works of cinema directed by Bong Joon Ho. “The Host (2006),” my first dose of Bong, is masterful sci-fi horror tinged with political satire. “Snowpiercer (2013)” is a joyously brutal, no-holds-barred interpretation of social class warfare. “Okja (2017)” is a whimsical and realistic take on mankind’s manipulation of nature and treatment of livestock. And, yes, “Parasite (2019),” which earned the Oscar for Best Motion Picture of Year.
“Mickey 17” is a good film but, I suspect, to most people it won’t seem to be. Keep in mind that I liked the film because I have a very low bar for what qualifies as good. “Mickey 17” provoked thought and my thought was, “Why didn’t I like this film when I should have?”
The movie has all the features that I want from worthwhile cinema: Commentary on the human condition, including how easy it is for us to disregard suffering. It shows the gullibility of the masses to superstitions such as God and eternal salvation that are fired by hatred for those who are unlike us and, in this case, that includes a smart and kind alien species resembling roly-polies. The film is rife with examples of what happens when a charismatic’s horrifying decisions and actions go unchecked. Still, overall, the movie stank.
I offer this advice for watching “Mickey 17.” Make no effort to look for a master plot that links the film’s many subplots. But, if you must have coherence, think of the movie as a redemption arc for Mickey. He goes from voluntarily serving as a throwaway, literally, human being to a person whose life matters. Pay attention to the all-to-brief discussion toward the middle of the movie about “multiples.” There are other neat components in the film exploring phenomena such as 3D printing, the variability of personality even if the person is other than naturally produced, and what makes a tasty sauce for your steak. Also, Pattinson is effective portraying Mickey as Forest Gump-like and John Wick-y-ish. Ackie is very good as Mickey’s protector and a smart, big-hearted cop who cares deeply for good people be they humans or pillbug aliens. Ruffalo is good as a prosperity church preacher and Collette as the brains behind the Niflheim colonization.
For some reason, the studio, producers, or other reviewers of “Mickey 17” have labeled the film sci-fi comedy. It’s not. Yes, there are some funny parts in the movie but its murky thrust is deadly serious. The problems we now face in this age of internet squalor and mass media propaganda, mind-boggling disparities between the wealthy and middle class and poor, soulless leadership, a gullible citizenry, and willingness to drop bombs is, more or less, factored in “Mickey 17.” So is the solution. Loyalty to each other is important but that loyalty must be smart, sincere, and reversible in case what you’re loyal to ends up the source of widespread misery, if not genocide.
Huh, looks like critiquing “Mickey 17” has helped me make better sense of the movie. I urge caution, anyway. If you see “Mickey 17,” you’ll take away this or that lesson. But, to me anyway, this is a film that requires more than one viewing to comprehend its intention and sweep. “Mickey 17” treats several interesting ideas like they are drive-by-shootings, deeds that had to be done without the risk of getting caught by staying in one place too long.
“Mickey 17” has very good sound effects – plenty of explosions and an alien language that covers the spectrum from shrill howling to nearly infrasound thrumming. Visual effects are good, too. I didn’t pay much attention to the score, maybe because a lot of that attention was applied toward understanding the movie.
“Mickey 17” is either an A or an F. Can’t decide. So, for the sake of Movie Face-Off consistency and to flank Del’s punctilious need for order, I’ll split the difference to give the film a B-/C+.
Let us know what you think.
Del’s take
“Punctilious need for order”? Grrrrrrr.
YOU, sir, are the product of a “punctilious need for order,” from the protons, neutrons and electrons of your physical self to the axons and dendrites of your brain – few they may be – and the glottals and dipthongs of your often incoherent speech. Were it not for a “punctilious need for order” you would be nothing more than an amorphous blob of undifferentiated protoplasm.
In other words, Donald Trump.
But I digress. The subject here is “Mickey 17.” What I hear you trying to say is what I’ve been thinking the past day and a half: I wanted to like “Mickey 17,” I wanted to feel as passionately supportive of “Mickey 17” as I did “Parasite.” I recognize the genius of Bong Joon Ho and “Mickey 17” is a solid piece of moviemaking. But I just didn’t get into it and I’m not sure why.
I didn’t feel a visceral connection with this film. I want to say it’s lacking the manic, absurdist energy of “Parasite,” or that perhaps Bong is trying to do too much with the film, diluting its vision. Maybe I’m overthinking the whole thing.
You said the movie wasn’t funny – it tried to be funny but somehow kept missing the mark. The humor was off by about a single octave and I struggled to laugh at scenes that were obviously intended to be laughed at. You said the movie was commentary about the human condition and it was most definitely that, though not quite so on-the-nose as “Snowpiercer” or “Parasite.” Let’s talk about that for a moment.
The movie is yet another Bong denunciation of class stratifications with the 3-D printed Mickey serving as a metaphor for throwaway people. Mark Ruffalo and Toni Collette, who play Kenneth and Ylfa Marshall, leaders of the expedition to the planet Niflheim (Get it? Marshall, i.e., the law-bringer and enforcer … oh, and Niflheim is the hell of Norse mythology), represent the highest caste, followed by a pantheon of lesser gods. Mladen’s roly-poly aliens are presented as the “other,” or in Republicanspeak, undocumented aliens.
But I think “Mickey 17” is about more than just class warfare. To my age-besotted brain, it’s a carefully calibrated observation about the corruptibility of man.
Mickey Barnes agrees to serve as an “expendable” aboard a spaceship traveling to the planet Niflheim. An expendable is somebody whose body and mind are mapped and kept on file. Should they die, a new version is printed and voila, dead guy is reborn. Crewmembers eagerly assign all the dangerous jobs to Mickey because they know he can always be reprinted. He’s like a cheap TV from a big box store – if it breaks, so what? Throw it away and buy a new one.
Mickey, in effect, becomes a commodity. There’s lots of talk in the movie about commodities and the value of things, from Mickey himself to Ylfa Marshall’s weird obsession with sauces. It seems everything in life has been commoditized, which is odd when you consider the exact same conversation is taking place in America right now, from our strange obsession with the price of eggs to strip-mining our national parks and invading Greenland. If empathy is removed from the life equation, all you’re left with are cold numbers. Life becomes purely transactional. Mickey’s disposability has indeed transformed him into something like a cheap TV.
But something happened during Mickey’s reprinting. Somebody tripped over a cable and Mickey was momentarily deprived of his “ink” supply. The Mickey that emerged was not the Mickey who was originally mapped but a newer, more innocent, almost child-like Mickey who becomes an easy mark for the people around him. As Mickey “dies” and is reborn through his 17 iterations he slowly accumulates experience until, on his 18th printing (the age that people are considered grown up), Mickey is bestowed with the cynicism and corruption that characterizes the rest of us. Luckily, Mickey 17 is still around to preserve what’s good about mankind.
Or maybe that interpretation is horseshit. I don’t know. If it isn’t, I don’t think Bong anticipated life would imitate art so soon.
Robert Pattinson is a good actor who does a solid job representing Mickey in his various iterations. Steven Yeun of “The Walking Dead” fame is also effective as Mickey’s careless and uncaring business partner and “friend,” Timo. The actor who stole the show for me was Mark Ruffalo’s Kenneth Marshall, a half-baked con artist falling somewhere between Trump and Jim Bakker of PTL Club infamy. He was wonderfully bumbling.
Overall I’d say “Mickey17” isn’t as thematically coherent as his previous efforts, or if it is, it’s a lot more subtle. Bottom line? I couldn’t develop an emotional bond with the film. It’s a good movie, well worth a trip to the theater, but if you’re expecting the intensity of “Snowpiercer” and the quiet yet biting drama of “Parasite,” you may be disappointed.
People keep asking Mickey what it feels like to die. How can he answer, when he hasn’t really lived?
I’m giving “Mickey 17” a grade of B. And that’s my punctilious need for a closer.
Mladen Rudman is a former journalist and technical writer. Del Stone Jr. is a former journalist and writer.
Protesters who commit crimes are criminals and should be arrested.
Protesters who are merely protesting aren’t doing anything wrong, and I make this distinction because Donald J. Trump did not when he recently called for the arrest and incarceration of protesters. He also threatened to withhold federal dollars from colleges that allow protesting. That’s rich, coming from a guy who, if there was any justice in the world, should be cooling his heels on Cellblock D, trading cigarettes for blowjobs.
Protesting is a Constitutionally-sanctioned form of speech in this country. It is allowed. And there is a long tradition of Americans protesting. In fact, I seem to remember one historically significant protest occurring in Boston a few hundred years ago that kicked off the American Revolution.
So you protesters, you go ahead and you protest. You march with your signs, you shout and you call for the action that you think is necessary to turn this country around. You’re not doing anything wrong. Just make sure you don’t break any laws.
And as for the Ayatollah Trump, I would remind him that we still have a Constitution in this country – at least we did last time I checked.
About the author:
Del Stone Jr. is a professional fiction writer. He is known primarily for his work in the contemporary dark fiction field, but has also published science fiction and contemporary fantasy. Stone’s stories, poetry and scripts have appeared in publications such as Amazing Stories, Eldritch Tales, and Bantam-Spectra’s Full Spectrum. His short fiction has been published in The Year’s Best Horror Stories XXII; Alfred Hitchcock’s Mystery Magazine; the Pocket Books anthology More Phobias; the Barnes & Noble anthologies 100 Wicked Little Witch Stories, Horrors! 365 Scary Stories, and 100 Astounding Little Alien Stories; the HWA anthology Psychos; and other short fiction venues, like Blood Muse, Live Without a Net, Zombiesque and Sex Macabre. Stone’s comic book debut was in the Clive Barker series of books, Hellraiser, published by Marvel/Epic and reprinted in The Best of Hellraiser anthology. He has also published stories in Penthouse Comix, and worked with artist Dave Dorman on many projects, including the illustrated novella “Roadkill,” a short story for the Andrew Vachss anthology Underground from Dark Horse, an ashcan titled “December” for Hero Illustrated, and several of Dorman’s Wasted Lands novellas and comics, such as Rail from Image and “The Uninvited.” Stone’s novel, Dead Heat, won the 1996 International Horror Guild’s award for best first novel and was a runner-up for the Bram Stoker Award. Stone has also been a finalist for the IHG award for short fiction, the British Fantasy Award for best novella, and a semifinalist for the Nebula and Writers of the Future awards. His stories have appeared in anthologies that have won the Bram Stoker Award and the World Fantasy Award. Two of his works were optioned for film, the novella “Black Tide” and short story “Crisis Line.”
Stone recently retired after a 41-year career in journalism. He won numerous awards for his work, and in 1986 was named Florida’s best columnist in his circulation division by the Florida Society of Newspaper Editors. In 2001 he received an honorable mention from the National Lesbian and Gay Journalists Association for his essay “When Freedom of Speech Ends” and in 2003 he was voted Best of the Best in the category of columnists by Emerald Coast Magazine. He participated in book signings and awareness campaigns, and was a guest on local television and radio programs.
As an addendum, Stone is single, kills tomatoes and morning glories with ruthless efficiency, once tied the stem of a cocktail cherry in a knot with his tongue, and carries a permanent scar on his chest after having been shot with a paintball gun. He’s in his 60s as of this writing but doesn’t look a day over 94.
Contact Del at [email protected]. He is also on Facebook, twitter, Pinterest, tumblr, TikTok, and Instagram. Visit his website at delstonejr.com .
I’m curious: Why aren’t Elon Musk’s competitors screaming bloody murder about his access to the United States government and the strings he’s able to pull?
Guys like Zuckerberg, Bezos and a host of others must be looking on with envy at the way Musk can access the private information of millions of Americans and pretty much do what he wants with it, no questions asked.
The business advantage this gives Musk is substantial, and it’s already working: The State Department wants to buy $400 million worth of armored Cybertrucks, and the FAA is thinking about replacing Verizon’s services with those provided by StarLink, at a cost of $2.4 billion.
These are very clear conflicts of interest, yet none of those billionaire good ol’ boys are uttering a peep.
Kinda makes me think something else is going on we should know about.
About the author:
Del Stone Jr. is a professional fiction writer. He is known primarily for his work in the contemporary dark fiction field, but has also published science fiction and contemporary fantasy. Stone’s stories, poetry and scripts have appeared in publications such as Amazing Stories, Eldritch Tales, and Bantam-Spectra’s Full Spectrum. His short fiction has been published in The Year’s Best Horror Stories XXII; Alfred Hitchcock’s Mystery Magazine; the Pocket Books anthology More Phobias; the Barnes & Noble anthologies 100 Wicked Little Witch Stories, Horrors! 365 Scary Stories, and 100 Astounding Little Alien Stories; the HWA anthology Psychos; and other short fiction venues, like Blood Muse, Live Without a Net, Zombiesque and Sex Macabre. Stone’s comic book debut was in the Clive Barker series of books, Hellraiser, published by Marvel/Epic and reprinted in The Best of Hellraiser anthology. He has also published stories in Penthouse Comix, and worked with artist Dave Dorman on many projects, including the illustrated novella “Roadkill,” a short story for the Andrew Vachss anthology Underground from Dark Horse, an ashcan titled “December” for Hero Illustrated, and several of Dorman’s Wasted Lands novellas and comics, such as Rail from Image and “The Uninvited.” Stone’s novel, Dead Heat, won the 1996 International Horror Guild’s award for best first novel and was a runner-up for the Bram Stoker Award. Stone has also been a finalist for the IHG award for short fiction, the British Fantasy Award for best novella, and a semifinalist for the Nebula and Writers of the Future awards. His stories have appeared in anthologies that have won the Bram Stoker Award and the World Fantasy Award. Two of his works were optioned for film, the novella “Black Tide” and short story “Crisis Line.”
Stone recently retired after a 41-year career in journalism. He won numerous awards for his work, and in 1986 was named Florida’s best columnist in his circulation division by the Florida Society of Newspaper Editors. In 2001 he received an honorable mention from the National Lesbian and Gay Journalists Association for his essay “When Freedom of Speech Ends” and in 2003 he was voted Best of the Best in the category of columnists by Emerald Coast Magazine. He participated in book signings and awareness campaigns, and was a guest on local television and radio programs.
As an addendum, Stone is single, kills tomatoes and morning glories with ruthless efficiency, once tied the stem of a cocktail cherry in a knot with his tongue, and carries a permanent scar on his chest after having been shot with a paintball gun. He’s in his 60s as of this writing but doesn’t look a day over 94.
Contact Del at [email protected]. He is also on Facebook, twitter, Pinterest, tumblr, TikTok, and Instagram. Visit his website at delstonejr.com .