Take a walk on the wild side at Bear Lake in Northwest Florida

Pitcher plants grow along the grassy shoreline of a slough along the hiking trail that surrounds Bear Lake northwest of Baker, Florida. Image by Del Stone Jr

Unpaved paradise: Just an hour north of here, along State Road 4 between Baker and Munson, lies Bear Lake. It’s smack in the middle of the Blackwater River State Park.

You gotta see this place.

We took the hiking tour of the lake, a four-mile trek that leads you through primeval sloughs and climax pine forest and bogs of flesh-eating plants.

I kid you not. A highlight of the hike is the pitcher plant bog, where thousands of bug-devouring Tubes of Death sprout from the muck to how down on flies and mosquitoes.

The trail is busy with benches for the bushed, bat boxes for our leathery buddies, bridges over the boggy parts – but no bathrooms for the bladder-burdened (that’s what all those woods are for).

Get ready for some serious beauty. We tiptoed through a grotto of overhanging trees that shaded a trickling creek. Within were stunning growths of moss, ferns and an outcropping of lavender, orchid-like flowers.

The hike will take some time, especially if you’re a camera nut who’s trying to learn about f-stops and shutter speeds. But it puts you back in touch with what’s real.

No American Express: We were at a “Destin eatery” and that’s all I’ll say about where it happened.

My friend had the eggs Benedict. I munched a monstrous salad.

When we finished I whipped out my Visa card. The lady shook her head. “We don’t take ANY credit cards.”

A cold chill ran up my spine. I had a fiver. My friend had $5. The bill was $13. How many dishes could we wash to make up the shortfall?

Then I remembered my Emergency Stash in the glove box of the truck. Got it. Paid the bill and had enough change to leave a tip.

No credit cards?

Better have the defibrillators handy.

One of the perks of this job is I get to hang out with cool people. Last week, one of those people was Daily News columnist Julie Nichols, who accompanied me to Cracker Barrel, where we lamented our expanding waistlines – she as she munched, bird-like, at a salad, and I as I pounded down the Brownie Piet and Ice Cream.

It was a great evening. Julie is smart and engaging and funny, and she’s a writer’s writer. If you’re not reading her column, you should be.

But have the salad.

More coolness: Last week brought Tavel Bell nee Cowan and her navigator husband, Major Tom, back to the Emerald Coast for a visit. Tavel was a Daily News copy editor from whom I sponged travel adventures about the slopes at Lake Tahoe.

The recently relocated Wolf Woman and I joined them at the Donut Hole in Destin – Major Tom and I weaseled them into a monster cookie apiece, and they capitulated with barely a mumble about diets. I think Major Tom came back solely for those huge cookies.

Redneck computer terms: “Window,” as in a place in the truck to hang your guns.

Words that should be words: This week’s installment is “Elbonics,” as in: The actions of two people maneuvering for one armrest in a movie theater.

This column was published in the Wednesday, April 16, 1997 edition of the Northwest Florida Daily News and is used with permission.

About the author:

Del Stone Jr. is a professional fiction writer. He is known primarily for his work in the contemporary dark fiction field, but has also published science fiction and contemporary fantasy. Stone’s stories, poetry and scripts have appeared in publications such as Amazing Stories, Eldritch Tales, and Bantam-Spectra’s Full Spectrum. His short fiction has been published in The Year’s Best Horror Stories XXII; Alfred Hitchcock’s Mystery Magazine; the Pocket Books anthology More Phobias; the Barnes & Noble anthologies 100 Wicked Little Witch Stories, Horrors! 365 Scary Stories, and 100 Astounding Little Alien Stories; the HWA anthology Psychos; and other short fiction venues, like Blood Muse, Live Without a Net, Zombiesque and Sex Macabre. Stone’s comic book debut was in the Clive Barker series of books, Hellraiser, published by Marvel/Epic and reprinted in The Best of Hellraiser anthology. He has also published stories in Penthouse Comix, and worked with artist Dave Dorman on many projects, including the illustrated novella “Roadkill,” a short story for the Andrew Vachss anthology Underground from Dark Horse, an ashcan titled “December” for Hero Illustrated, and several of Dorman’s Wasted Lands novellas and comics, such as Rail from Image and “The Uninvited.” Stone’s novel, Dead Heat, won the 1996 International Horror Guild’s award for best first novel and was a runner-up for the Bram Stoker Award. Stone has also been a finalist for the IHG award for short fiction, the British Fantasy Award for best novella, and a semifinalist for the Nebula and Writers of the Future awards. His stories have appeared in anthologies that have won the Bram Stoker Award and the World Fantasy Award. Two of his works were optioned for film, the novella “Black Tide” and short story “Crisis Line.”

Stone recently retired after a 41-year career in journalism. He won numerous awards for his work, and in 1986 was named Florida’s best columnist in his circulation division by the Florida Society of Newspaper Editors. In 2001 he received an honorable mention from the National Lesbian and Gay Journalists Association for his essay “When Freedom of Speech Ends” and in 2003 he was voted Best of the Best in the category of columnists by Emerald Coast Magazine. He participated in book signings and awareness campaigns, and was a guest on local television and radio programs.

As an addendum, Stone is single, kills tomatoes and morning glories with ruthless efficiency, once tied the stem of a cocktail cherry in a knot with his tongue, and carries a permanent scar on his chest after having been shot with a paintball gun. He’s in his 60s as of this writing but doesn’t look a day over 94.

Contact Del at [email protected]. He is also on Facebook, twitter, Pinterest, tumblr, TikTok, and Instagram. Visit his website at delstonejr.com .